Angry & sad

For the past couple of months I've spent time walking a dog along the river that flows through downtown. Dog & I observe construction workers, joggers, fishermen, & the homeless. In the warmer weather the homeless men would sleep on the picnic tables or just on the grass. What do they do in the cold? Then one day I had an idea! I'd buy some of my fave Smartwool socks and hand them out. But will the men still be there in the park? In the cold?

So, mass shooting after mass shooting and we still allow assault rifles because our government is paid off by the NRA. I was sitting in the waiting room at the cancer center waiting for my last neulasta injection when I saw on the tv the first reports of the Sandy Hook shootings. Kindergarteners! First Graders! How much is a child's life worth to these senators & congressmen? How can they look at their children and not feel outrage that some kids don't get to grow up?

I just cannot understand. Here I am thinking about buying socks & things for a couple of homeless men when other people don't give a shit. I already know I'm a better person than someone who accepts money from the NRA or Russia. I am a better person than pretty much anyone running this country. That I am sure of, that is a fact. Maybe my $25 Lifestraw filter donation to someplace in Puerto Rico wasn't much but it might make a difference to one person. I often imagine what I would do with millions of dollars. I'd buy a cute little house & a really cool car. Then I would do things, good things.