What I forgot before...

I was writing the earlier post and  forgot what I was going to add. I think I do have chemo brain. I can't concentrate in a noisy room snd I absolutely can't remember shit unless I write it down and then sometimes I can't remember what the notes were about! Yep #mylife #waitijustgotuptododomething #cant rememberwhatiwasgoingtotellyou

Anyway, I'm feeling stuck. I see on the evil Facebook that all of my friends have either married or had kids. I'm happy for them but geez! I keep waiting for my life to begin but cancer keeps crashing the party. (Autocorrect helped me with that gem!) I feel like they have all moved on but me. It's hard to "go big or go home" when you hardly have the funds to actually leave home. I feel my inner optimist inside but way deep inside traumatized by everything I've gone through. I honestly cannot think of one thing I'm looking forward to, not one thing I'm excited about. And that sucks more than anyone can ever know...