Sad day

I was briefly an aunt to a little 8 year old girl who was going to be adopted. Things didn't work out & she left today. I didn't get to say goodbye...

My advice for the day: don't get attached.

http://www.elephantjournal.com/2016/01/freedom-from-attachment-viewing-the-glass-as-if-its-already-broken/

Poem

From book Voices of Breast Cancer.

Faslodex...mmm, tasty??

Saw the oncologist today. He scheduled a bone scan & a CT for March 11. I told him about the ocular migraines iceberg having and the nausea from the last Faslodex injection. 

Today as Jackie (nurse who does my injections--love her) injected the second syringe I could taste the drug. So weird! I taste the saline when they flush my port but that goes into a vein. The Fas goes into muscle. Jackie asked some of the other nurses to see if their patients reported tasting it. Nope. 

Exam room:

Chemo Brain

 BY ANGELA BANKER

10 Things Anybody Who’s Experienced Chemo Brain Can Relate To

We have all heard of chemo brain. It is often referred to as a mental cloudiness or fog. It’s a decrease in one’s mental sharpness that often coincides with the effects of chemotherapy. Perhaps it could be caused by a lack of sleep or low blood counts. Either way, chemotherapy-related cognitive impairment is not pleasant to experience. What does chemo brain feel like? And how can you ease the symptoms? Read the list below.

1. Forgetting Things I Already Know– In elementary school you learned your basic math facts; you drilled those into your rote memory. When your daughter asks you to quickly correct her math page, you become flustered. What was 6 x 4 again? Or when you have worked in the same cubicle next to your co-worker for the last four years and you simply cannot remember their name even when it’s at the tip of your tongue.
2. Lack Of Concentration – While sitting in a meeting, you noticed you cannot recall the last five minutes. What were we discussing again? You just hope one of your co-workers is kind enough to fill in those gaps you missed. Where did your mind go during the meeting? You can’t remember!
3. Losing Your Train Of Thought – You are having a great conversation with your best friend when all of a sudden you forgot what you were talking about. It doesn’t happen just once, but multiple . . . Wait! What was I saying again?
4. Forgetting The Simple Things – Those small, everyday things can be the hardest to remember at times. You may rush out the door and get to your car before you question yourself, “Did I lock the front door?” You may get all the way to work before you call and question your husband, “Did I turn off the iron?” You could return home to notice you failed to turn off the television when you left earlier.



5. Trouble Multi-tasking – Multi-tasking is an art form. When you add chemo brain into the mix, it becomes more difficult. Trying to do two or three things at once during this time is challenging. You can cook and talk on the phone at the same time most days, but when you have chemo brain, you tend to forget that spaghetti sauce simmering on the stove top.
6. Difficulty Learning New Things – Focus and concentration are qualities that go into learning. Chemo brain often affects each of those making learning that new skill even harder to do. Imagine you have been a dancer since high school. Learning your new routines now is taking twice, sometimes three, times longer.
7. Forgetting What You Were Going To Do – You stopped cleaning the kitchen in mid-clean to grab something in the living room. As soon as you walk in there, you ask yourself the 4 W’s. Why did I come in here? What was I going to do? Where was I really going? When did I forget?
8. Difficulty Speaking – That moment when you can’t remember what your favorite box of cereal is called – “That box, over there, in that thing. It’s red. It’s this tall. It’s . . . “ – can be embarrassing. Often times you know what you are talking about, but you just can’t seem to get the right words out.
9. Mental Fatigue – Add this to the lack of focus and the inability to concentrate. Your mind is just tired. Your brain feels overworked early in the afternoon leading to more confusion when you’re trying to follow a conversation. You could use a mental nap and find zoning out is becoming a frequent habit.

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Chemo brain is a real symptom that comes with taking chemotherapy. You may find yourself reading this list saying, “I’ve had that and I’ve never taken chemotherapy.” It’s true! We have all experienced these. Imagine experiencing it ten times more frequently, or on a daily basis. Chemo brain takes those cognitive issues we have and intensifies them. Be patient with a person who is experiencing these symptoms. Often times they become frustrated themselves and would appreciate the support.

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TIPS TO HELP

If you are currently experiencing these chemo brain symptoms, there are ways to help get yourself through them. Utilize a planner or smart phone to keep track of your appointments. Keep sticky notes or a white board handy in every room; write down what you need to remember or questions to ask when they occur. Eliminate the multi-tasking by only doing one thing at a time. Repeat aloud (multiple times) what you would like to remember if you do not have any of the above available. Get enough rest and sleep to help alleviate the fatigue. Get moving! Exercise, even a slow walk, can help improve your mood and make you feel more alert. Exercise your brain as well by completing brain games like puzzles or crosswords. Eat food, like vegetables and Omega-3 rich foods, which help keep our brain power up. Lastly, don’t forget to ask for help. There are so many people around you that would like to help; utilize them when you need to.

http://blog.thebreastcancersite.com/angela-chemo-brain-list/

7, 10, 12, 15 & 16

17 Things No One Tells You About Breast Cancer  

1. Breast cancer isn’t something you can overcome with sheer will.

“I wish people would stop saying they ‘beat’ cancer. I saw a commercial the other day that featured a breast cancer survivor saying that ‘you can do anything you set your mind to.’ It’s not that simple.”—Miranda Hermanski, Facebook

2. And dying from cancer doesn’t mean someone didn’t fight hard enough.

Christinaloehr / Getty Images / Via thinkstockphotos.com

“I wish people would stop using ‘he/she lost the battle, lost the fight’ to me, losing has a negative connotation and cancer is a disease, not a competition. Both my parents died from cancer, they never lost any battles, they just got very sick and died.”—Ivan A. Cintron Colon, Facebook

3. Breast cancer can hit anyone…

Airman Magazine / Creative Commons / Via Flickr: airmanmagazine

“I am a 30-year old mother-of-two living with stage 4 breast cancer. I was diagnosed about a week after my 30th birthday. I wish I didn’t forget that just because you’re young doesn’t mean you’re invincible, and just because you’re a parent doesn’t mean you’re exempt.”—Nari Han Miller, Facebook

4. …Of any age…

“I wish I knew it was possible to get breast cancer as a teenager. When I go to appointments with my mum, people always think she’s the patient. I was very fortunate that my only treatment was surgery but juggling school and breast surgery wasn’t exactly easy.”—Beth Porch, Facebook

5. …And any gender.

My dad was diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer last November. He’s in hospice care now. Most men find it too late because they aren’t looking.”—katymaried

6. And most people don’t know ‘why’ they got breast cancer.

4thfullmood / Creative Commons / Via Flickr: 4thfullmoon

“I didn’t ‘do’ anything to get cancer. It’s not in my family, I didn’t eat the wrong foods. I just had bad cells. Stop asking me why. I don’t know.”—Julianne Beach, Facebook

7. Sometimes, all the pink ribbons and fun runs can be isolating and distracting.

Pifate / Getty Images / Viathinkstockphotos.com

Susan G. Komen / Creative Commons / Via Flickr: susangkomenforthecure

“The party atmosphere often surrounding pink ribbon promotions and campaigns conceals the harsh, devastating effects of breast cancer. We are not celebrating a holiday. This is not a sporting event where the side wearing the most team colors wins. Many women afflicted by breast cancer are troubled with how the pink marketing culture has distracted us from the goal of a cure, and as someone diagnosed with the disease in 2011, I feel the same way.”—Camille Gryszka Miller, Facebook

8. Just because someone seems incredibly brave, that doesn’t mean they aren’t also scared shitless.

Laura Taylor / Creative Commons / Via Flickr: bookgrl

“The scars can be scary, and while you feel brave for getting through this bout, you always wonder if you’ll have another, and part of you, even if it’s deep down, worries that current or future partners might be bothered by them.”—aliciareneeg

9. It can be awkward and uncomfortable to talk about your breast cancer.

Anna Borges / Via buzzfeed.com

“I wish I would have known that it’s be incredibly hard to talk about in certain social situations, especially work, and to not put myself down and feel awkward for being uncomfortable with it.”—Kalin Delfino, Facebook

10. But please, don’t pull away from your friends who are sick.

Jenny Chang / Via buzzfeed.com

“Abandoning me because you don’t know what to say hurts worse than you saying the wrong thing. I don’t need my friends to solve my problems; I just need my friends.”—Andrea Reynolds, Facebook

11. If you have no idea where to start, just ask how you can help.

BuzzFeed Life

“If you want to help someone with breast cancer, bring them a meal to freeze. Drive the kids to school, or offer to drive them to treatments and sit through them with them. Give money to the actual family in need. Babysit. Tidy up the house or the garden. Wash their car. Help with the little things that seem less important at the time. I appreciated it more than any dumb pink ribbon.”—kindacanadian

12. Catchy slogans may raise awareness, but they’re not always helpful and relatable.

“I wish people would stop saying ‘save the tatas’ etc… There is an entire person worth saving there — not just the breasts.”—yuffiebunny

13. While positivity is always welcome, please don’t downplay the severity of this disease.

Monthian / Getty Images / Via thinkstockphotos.com

“It’s not OK because it’s ‘just breast cancer’ instead of a ‘worse cancer.’”—butterkitten

14. And remember, having a mastectomy with breast reconstruction surgery isn’t really the same as a typical breast augmentation.

“I wish my friends who had breast augmentation wouldn’t have compared their surgeries with my reconstruction after bilateral mastectomies. You. Have. No. Idea.”—tatianaturners

15. Even when someone seems to be healthy, that doesn’t mean they aren’t still dealing with mental, physical, or emotional aspects of the disease.

“I wish people would stop using the term ‘cancer free’ because you are never truly ‘free’ from cancer.”—Kelly Long, Facebook

16. Because sometimes what comes after breast cancer treatment can be the hardest part.

Jenny Chang / Via buzzfeed.com

“The sense of fighting to survive leaves and you are left with depression, anxiety, debt, lack of job opportunities, lack of romantic prospects, fear of the cancer returning and a load of other issues that none of the doctors ever address. You are left alone to figure out the clusterfuck that is now your life. Your cancer family — other people with cancer you meet along the way — will become your lifelong family and will be the people who truly understand what you are going through.”—sarahh41a77a916

17. Above all, be there for your loved ones living with breast cancer, and remind them of how important they truly are.

“I wish I could remind myself every day that I am not DYING of cancer, but LIVING with cancer. I wish I could remind myself every day that I’d rather have this life than no life at all.”

http://allhealthguidance.com/17-things-no-one-tells-you-about-breast-cancer/

Laughs

Faslodex

Had another injection today. Feeling nauseous tonight. That's number one on the side effect list. Ugh!
The injections weren't too painful today! Woo hoo!
Here's a good explanation of what the drug does:

Faslodex does three different things to stop the growth of cancer. First, it mimics tamoxifen by blocking estrogen from attaching itself to the special receptors on cancer cells. Think of making blueberry muffins. You fill each muffin cup with batter, and any leftover batter you have at the end–too bad, nowhere to go. Faslodex “fills” a cell’s estrogen receptors, leaving no room for estrogen. Breast cancer cells deprived of their estrogen go dormant, and almost always eventually die; some even die immediately. 

In addition, Faslodex changes the shape of the estrogen receptors themselves, causing them to become less functional; and the cancer cells of patients treated with Faslodex actually show a decrease in estrogen receptors over time. So it’s a triple threat, and is called a “second line defense” against metastatic cancer, once tamoxifen et. al. have failed to be effective.

- See more at: http://www.healthcentral.com/breast-cancer/c/78/17534/cancer-faqs/#sthash.GSeZAkzZ.dpuf